The One That Can Spell Betrayal. . .

Poor old Joanna Lumley, she stated yesterday that she trusted Gordon Brown following their meeting about the Gurkhas.

She's learned that lesson then.

At around 2:20 this afternoon, the Sky News ticker was promoting a press conference from the Gurkha representatives that was going to be detailing 'shocking and disturbing revelations' at 4pm.

4pm comes and it transpires that the five Gurkhas acting as test cases had been refused leave to remain in the UK. The shit was going to hit the fan.

4:10pm comes and Sky News reveals that Immigration Minister, Phil 'Custard Pie' Woolas was in an emergency meeting with Lumley. I can only imagine the meeting was going thus:

Woolas: You are one of our country's most loved actresses, representing a group of people that hold a reverential position in the nation's collective heart. Everyone hates us, please don't go and do a hatchet job on us.

Lumley: Then why piss on them, when you expressly told me you wouldn't?

Woolas: We just can't help it, it is second nature, we say we'll do one thing, you can be sure we'll go and do the exact opposite. It's crazy isn't it?

Lumley: Well what are you going to do about it?

Woolas: Resign.

Lumley: Really?

Woolas: No, I always do the opposite of what I say.

The thing is, we've a government that will piss money away on anything. Anything, and upset hundreds of thousands of people. They won't spend money on what we support.

Here's Snowolf's test for ex-Gurkhas wanting to settle in the UK:

1. Is the individual a serving or ex-member of the Gurkha regiment?

2. That's it.

Fucking simple, isn't it?

UPDATE

Well, Joanna and her team very politely tore the government a new arsehole.

There'll be nokias flying around Number 10 this afternoon, as it appears that Broon didn't know about the rejection letters (which Woolas tried to argue weren't rejections. Well if they weren't granted, what are they?) when he met Lumley. Woolas has been made to look very foolish, and the whole thing could have been very easily solved by letting the Gurkhas stay in the UK. Public support is almost unanimous. Jusy bloody do it.

Jesus, why does this government have to make such a meal of everything?