Tuesday 28 October 2008

The One That Thinks There Might Be Something In This Climate Change Lark. . .

Northampton Town's Sixfields Stadium earlier this evening.


It must be climate change, there is no other possible explanation. I mean when was the last time you saw a league match being postponed in bloody October?

We must take positive action, Comrades. The Arctic ice-shelf is on the rampage, the townsfolk of Northampton losing football fixtures to the weather, kids in the Midlands building bloody snowmen! In pissing October! Won't somebody think of the children? What sort of world will they grow up in? Are they expected to build igloos in their summer holidays?

Join me, join me in turning the heating up full blast and opening all the windows, drive everywhere, even if it is to put a bag in the bin, as fast as you can, in first gear, sit in your armchair drinking a cup of tea in one hand and have an orbital sander whirring around in the other. We must stop the climate from changing!

2 comments:

Leg-iron said...

Brew loads of beer and wine. That'll produce a lot of CO2 and leave you with a nourishing residue that doesn't protect from the cold but does prevent you worrying about it.

Get a chimenea - those are still legitimate even though garden fires are banned. Most will burn coal too and they are at their best when flames come out of the chimney in a roaring jet.

It's sub-zero and snowing here, more like January than October. If there's any truth in man-made global warming then we can't be doing it right. I blame those low-power light bulbs myself.

Methane is what we need. Lots of it. Beans all round!

Can't wait to see the next global warming claims. Especially when the power goes off and they won't let us burn coal. I wonder how combustible the average Green is?

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