The One That Is Thinking Of The Chiiiiiiiildren. . .

Some people would rather Gary Glitter look after their kids, than this bastard.

We have kids leaving school unable to read, write or do basic mathematics. We have kids in school who are subjected to violent attack on a daily basis (more on this later during the week) whilst the teachers stand there wringing their hands over the reputation to the school and the 'rights' of the kids perpetrating that violence. We have kids born into a life of state dependency where they grow up learning the lesson that there's no point in trying to get on, because the government will penalise you for trying to do so.

But all that pales into insignificance compared to the threat posed by Tony the Tiger.

Which? have branded Tony the Tiger, Snap, Crackle & Pop and others as villains for failing to promote healthy eating.

Well here's an entertaining perspective. It isn't the job of these companies to promote healthy eating. It is their job to promote their products. I'm not about to start criticising BA for failing to promote taking the Eurostar (and following my experiences with the World's Most Arrogant Airline, that's about the only thing I won't criticise them for). Here's another entertaining perspective; why don't we criticise the parents of these little porkers for putting this shite down their throats in the first place? We've removed junk food advertising from kiddies TV, we've pointed out that eating this shit has the result you'd expect, why do we need these people to do more?

The parents have more than enough information to make a choice, it is plastered all over the packaging. Don't give me the bullshit that it is 'confusing', this is the worst kind of patronising testiculating*. It is akin to ruffling people's hair and saying 'it's very complicated. Don't worry your pretty little head about it, I'll read it and tell you what to do. Go and have this little sugar free lollipop.'

Just in case there's any doubt: If you feed your children shit that is full of fat, sugar, salt and preservatives, they will grow fat, ugly, inattentive, stupid and suffer huge mood swings and behavioural problems. Clear enough?

Well, obviously not as the self-important arse-clown at Which? says that:

'If the industry fails to act, the government should step in.'

Give me strength, look just stick to telling me how much car X does to the gallon, if fridge Y is going to catch fire and if satelite system Z lets me pick up specialist German hardcore porn. Do not get involved in policy and lobbying. It is none of your fucking business. Just say that coco-mallow-sugar-flakes are shit, and shredded wheat is good. That is all that is required of you, thank you very much.

*testiculating - waving your arms around in the air, whilst talking bollocks.