Perhaps you'd like to take my TV, sofa and car as well?

A collection of mugs, earlier today.

Oh, here's a good idea:

The European Commission has put forward proposals for direct EU taxes on member states, including a possible EU-wide value-added tax (VAT).

The proposals are part of a package of options for finding new sources of revenue for the European Union budget.

Yes, because what the EU really needs is more cash which it can piss up the wall and then not tell us for what or why, which can then be submitted in accounts which make auditors break out in a cold sweat.

Hang on a second. . .


. . . right, I'm back, I just went into the drawer and got my crystal ball out. Let's see what we can see, shall we?

Hmmm, the mists are clearing. I can see our VAT going up, and this EUVAT being added on top of our existing taxes. Bearing in mind, there's a spending review announcement tomorrow, we're all going to be shafted good and proper. The poor old French are all out on strike, they're going to have to work until they're 62! Sixty bloody two!

Back to the crystal ball. Oh, hello, what's this? Oh look, there's also no reduction in the annual subs we pay.

Just in case you're not completely clear, you may find that some people try to persuade you that the government pays our green fees for this squalid little golf club. Just remember, the government doesn't have any money of its own, it is money that is taken from you on threat of going to prison.

Something else is coming through now, ahh yes. It's the big three parties, all stamping their feet and saying 'No!' Don't their faces look all serious? Let's skip forward a few months. Oh look, we've now got the EUVAT, no the politicians didn't lie, it's all down to existing treaties, see? And there was me thinking that Parliaments couldn't bind their successors.

Oh well, you live and learn.

The EU can take a flying fuck at a rolling doughnut, by the way.