The One That Is Asking 'Has It Really Come To This?' . . .

Perhaps I'm cynical.

Scrub that.

I am cynical. Having watched the politicians in action, having seen them lie in their manifesto and then successfully argue in court that an election manifesto does not constitute a promise, having seen them take advantage of an expenses system that they themselves set up to trouser thousands of pounds, having seem them charged with theft as a result and then considering an attempt to exploit parliamentary privilege to get out of it, having seen them spin, lie and steal, I do not take anything they say or do at face value.

Is it any wonder that I look on two news items this morning with a world-weary eye? I wonder who is advising Labour at the moment?

Alastair Campbell has emotionally denied Tony Blair misled MPs or Parliament over the intelligence in the run-up to the 2003 Iraq war.

Well, he would, wouldn't he?

Mr Campbell had to take a moment to compose himself after being asked the question on the BBC's Andrew Marr Show.

He said the subject kept being brought up by those wanting to "settle scores".

Had to take a moment to compose himself? One has to wonder if he's more upset by the idea of Parliament being misled or by the suggestion that his old chum Bliar would do that.

Given the last sentence, it would appear to be the latter. Is it all a nasty playground campaign, Alastair? Tut. Terrible, isn't it? I mean, it isn't as if you've ever employed smear tactics, is it? Listen to the high-pitched whine.

Then there's Piers Morgan's interview with the Prime Mentalist. Morgan's always banging on about what great mates he is with the Browns and what lovely people they are. He's the master of the celeb puff interview which he tries to make look as if it has substance. It's a sheep in wolf's clothing.

Given their great mateship (and Morgan really does seem to appreciate Sarah Brown a little more than is perhaps healthy. Bugger John Terry and Wayne Bridge's missus, Morgan and Sarah Brown, that's a story I'd like to read), this interview was always going to be very sympathetic to Brown and I don't doubt that Morgan bent over backwards to try and make Brown look more human.

Gordon Brown has wept talking about the death of his daughter in a television interview, it has emerged.

Do I have to say it? Oh, go on then. Losing a child, blah blah, tragedy, waffle waffle, no parent should have to deal with, yada yada. But I do not for one moment think this interview has happened now by accident, they could have done this at any point over the last 8 years, now they stare down the barrel of an election where selling Brown will be like selling a bag of dog shit, he is humanising himself.

The message here is vote Brown - his daughter died.

That stinks.

The Prime Minister became upset recalling when he realised baby Jennifer Jane would not survive.

She died after a brain haemorrhage when she was 10 days old in 2002. Mr Brown is believed to have described being with Jennifer in her final moments.

Mr Brown opened up to television host Piers Morgan in front of a studio audience. The interview will be broadcast by ITV next Sunday.

Good Lord, so who is Cameron going to talk to about his family tragedies? If Brown has had an interview like this, CMD will have to have one too. Mustn't be left behind.

The Prime Minister also talked about his three-year-old son Fraser's battle with cystic fibrosis and his hopes for a cure, the Mail on Sunday reports.

Bloody hell. It's like the audition stage of X-Factor. Brown can't sing, but he's had a rough time, and really really wants this, and he'll try, God knows he'll give it his all, if you'd just give him this chance to prove himself and call this premium rate phone number.

[Morgan] The ex spin doctor, who advises the Prime Minister part-time, said [. . .]"I don't believe Gordon went on television with the purpose of crying," he told the BBC.

Then you're either a fool or a liar, Morgan.

Are we now supposed to vote for the candidate with the biggest personal disaster story, or who has the biggest meltdown, or the most entertaining tantrum? What next? Junior ministers throwing themselves on the floor in the confectionary aisle in Tesco and having a paddy because the nasty man won't let them steal taxpayer cash to buy a bag of sweeties?

This really is all Labour have left. They can't campaign on policy, because they've all been shown to be disasters. They can't campaign on unity, because they are firing the first bullets in what is going to be a very messy civil war. They can't campaign on character, as they've been shown to be lying, theiving and probably criminal.

All they have is tears and tantrums and have to hope that like a weak parent, we'll give them what they want for five minute's peace. A parent that gives in to their kid's tantrums will raise a spolit, selfish and dysfunctional child. An electorate that does the same, will experience the same.