Predictions seem to be in fashion at the moment. Can’t think why. Anyhow, here’s a list of ten predictions, some serious, some hopeful (I’ll leave you to decide which are which) for the coming year:
1 – Labour to be effectively wiped off the map across the country in the election, by PC in Wales, SNP in Scotland and pretty much anyone in England. Only a few pockets remain in the north of England and inner cities. A very slim Tory majority, and yet bizarrely, given the collapse of Labour, no significant increase for the Lib Dems.
2 – BNP to take one or two seats.
3 – Huge numbers of sitting MPs from all parties lose their seats in light of on-going court cases as peers and former MPs who are attempting to drag as many of their former colleagues down into the shit as they can. This, coupled with the number of MPs who decided not to contest the election leads to one of the youngest and most inexperienced parliaments in history. A bigger class of lobby fodder leads to even more disconnect from the public.
4 – The most cynical, hurtful and dirty campaign ever seen erupts between the vultures for Gordon’s old job of party leader. Even more damage as the mainmast is ripped out of a ship already holed below the waterline.
5 – Cameron’s repeated inaction over Lisbon/EU question causes Parliamentary rift in the party with a number of MPs and large number of members jumping to UKIP.
6 – Dave’s lifespan as PM to be no longer than 12 months following an election. Boris tries to get nomination for first safe Tory seat that comes up for by-election, perhaps even leaning on a sympathetic or vulnerable dinosaur to take the Chiltern Hundreds.
7 – Lack of progress in party leads to split of Liberal faction from Lib Dems, remaining faction attract a number of Social Democrat members from Labour party as ‘Old Labour’ retakes ground in the party in a move that is heralded as ‘SDP II – This time it’s laughable.’
8 – Extended and bitter protest against fuel prices as (deferred) duty increases compound high prices at refinery gates. First view of life in the Climate Change legislation era.
9 – Gordon Brown found dead or admitted to psychiatric hospital following complete breakdown as he struggles to come to terms with his ejection from office and very slim majority over SNP in his seat.
10 – England get to the quarter finals of the World Cup only to go out on penalties, having led for 75 minutes of the match. England get beaten 4-0 in the Ashes series in Australia (oh, hang on, that’s going into 2011. . .)
Showing posts with label bloody stupid predictions. Show all posts
Showing posts with label bloody stupid predictions. Show all posts
Friday, 1 January 2010
Monday, 14 December 2009
The One That Is Saying 'Oh No It Isn't!'. . .
I love this time of year, and I love panto.
Oh, no, hang on. That's not true. I hate panto.
Anyhow, here is a clip of Al Gore telling anyone who cares to listen that the arctic polar ice caps will disappear within 5 years.
No, it isn't at Copenhagen, it's at the opening of a dinosaur park (????) in Germany and was posted on 13th December 2008.
Today is 14th December 2009 and Sky News are reporting on TV (not yet on website) that Gore has told Copenhagen that there is a 70% chance that the arctic ice caps could disappear in the summer period within the next 5 to 7 years. There's a weasely little argument. There's a chance that something might happen, over some vague period of time. No evidence, no debate, an assertation. It can not be proved or disproved, except with hindsight, but you'll just keep resetting the clock, won't you?
Tell me Al, is this 5 years from today, or is it really 4 years? Will you say the same thing with the same time scale this time next year, and the year after that? Will you still be saying this in 2020? Why do you say this in the run up to Christmas every year? Presents to buy? What is the size of the arctic ice now, as compared to the previous ten years, say? (I don't know the answer, I haven't checked)
If the news is accurate, it would seem that the developing nations in Africa have spat the dummy and walked out. Is it because of their burning desire to see Gaia saved? Or is it that they can make a huge pile of aid cash out of this, most of which will end up in Swiss numbered bank accounts?
Assuming this walk out means that Copenhagen is a dead duck (expect China, India and the Saudis to say 'Oh, what's the point?') and no deal is in the offing, what will you say in 2014, 2015 and 2016 when August comes and the arctic ice caps are still very much there, Al? Indeed what will you say if the summer coverage has actually increased?
You run the risk of making some people very angry, and an electric car is no good for running away from baying mobs with sets of gallows on wheels.
Oh, what am I thinking? You won't have an electric car, will you Al? You're far too important for that, you are doing the work of the Great Green God, like the leader of some wierd cult, your needs are paramount. It's only little people that are killing the planet.
Oh, no, hang on. That's not true. I hate panto.
Anyhow, here is a clip of Al Gore telling anyone who cares to listen that the arctic polar ice caps will disappear within 5 years.
No, it isn't at Copenhagen, it's at the opening of a dinosaur park (????) in Germany and was posted on 13th December 2008.
Today is 14th December 2009 and Sky News are reporting on TV (not yet on website) that Gore has told Copenhagen that there is a 70% chance that the arctic ice caps could disappear in the summer period within the next 5 to 7 years. There's a weasely little argument. There's a chance that something might happen, over some vague period of time. No evidence, no debate, an assertation. It can not be proved or disproved, except with hindsight, but you'll just keep resetting the clock, won't you?
Tell me Al, is this 5 years from today, or is it really 4 years? Will you say the same thing with the same time scale this time next year, and the year after that? Will you still be saying this in 2020? Why do you say this in the run up to Christmas every year? Presents to buy? What is the size of the arctic ice now, as compared to the previous ten years, say? (I don't know the answer, I haven't checked)
If the news is accurate, it would seem that the developing nations in Africa have spat the dummy and walked out. Is it because of their burning desire to see Gaia saved? Or is it that they can make a huge pile of aid cash out of this, most of which will end up in Swiss numbered bank accounts?
Assuming this walk out means that Copenhagen is a dead duck (expect China, India and the Saudis to say 'Oh, what's the point?') and no deal is in the offing, what will you say in 2014, 2015 and 2016 when August comes and the arctic ice caps are still very much there, Al? Indeed what will you say if the summer coverage has actually increased?
You run the risk of making some people very angry, and an electric car is no good for running away from baying mobs with sets of gallows on wheels.
Oh, what am I thinking? You won't have an electric car, will you Al? You're far too important for that, you are doing the work of the Great Green God, like the leader of some wierd cult, your needs are paramount. It's only little people that are killing the planet.
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