. . . and every day would be a Friday and the first day of spring.

I've just seen an entertaining bit of fantasy on Sky News about what an independent Scotland would look like. (The original video report is embedded in the web-site article here.)

I'm actually quite positive about the idea of a seperate Scotland. Not because of the old chestnut about the money that heads north over the border - they're part of the UK and some parts of the UK are richer than others, you don't hear people from Harrogate complaining about money being spent in Helston, so I in Canterbury won't complain about money being spent in Coatbridge.

No, what I find attractive about the prospect of Scottish independence is that it also has the potential to free me and you.

How so? Well, the report is full of exciting stuff like this is what a Scottish passport would look like, votes for 16 year olds, a nuke free Scotland and all that, but it omitted some pretty important stuff, not least the fact that Salmond has wilfully missed something out.

You see, I'm not entirely sure that Scottish independence is as simple as a matter of a referendum north of the border. As I understand it we're not talking about independence, we're talking about the dissolution of the Union here, surely a question for both north and south?

The irony being that I think a referendum on dissolution of the Union stands more chance of being carried with the English and Scots involved than it does with just the Scots. (That is, slim chance as opposed to no chance). It's been well played by Salmond - if a referendum gets scuppered on constitutional grounds (likely) then it's another ploy by the dastardly English to undermine the manifest destiny of the Scots. If it doesn't, and at a vote it will not be carried, then it's another ploy by the dastardly English to undermine the manifest destiny of the Scots.

However, there is one big reason why I'd be voting yes, because if Scotland gets independence, the UK would cease to be, and it is the UK which is a member of the EU. So surely, no UK = no EU membership?

It is complete fantasy, because it just isn't going to happen. But can you imagine the clusterfuck if such a referendum was carried and all of a sudden re-application was on the cards? Would cast-iron Dave have the balls to put us up for re-entry without asking us? There would be open revolution.

And Sky talk about Scotland adopting the Euro. Blimey, that's like booking a cabin on the Titanic as the first lifeboat is being cast off.

It's all completely mad.