I'll just leave it at this.
It doesn't matter Gordon, there's always someone who drops a bigger bollock, you just have to know where to look.
Ah, here we go . . .
A lost sailor has had to be rescued after running out of fuel circling a small island when he thought he was sailing around the UK coast.
Probably a local, not for nothing is it known around the Garden of England as 'Six Toe Island'.
The Sheerness lifeboat and the Thames Coastguard assisted the man who ran aground off the Elmley Marshes on the Isle of Sheppey on 19 April.
With only a road map for directions, he set off on the river Medway, from Gillingham, and headed for Southampton.
But the RNLI said the man had "ended up travelling round the Isle of Sheppey".
There you go Gordon, what do you think of his efforts?
Yes, my sentiments exactly.